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You’ll hear that expressed in terms like “You’re so articulate” or “Can you believe that this ‘little lady’ can do (insert normal business function here).” Ignorance and confusion are hardly conducive to a good relationship.
The good news is that there are a growing number of white men who know, trust and rely on their black women colleagues.
All Blacks star Aaron Smith had been having a sordid affair with a lawyer for two years before they were caught having sex in the disabled toilet of an airport before a rugby test match.
Daily Mail Australia can reveal the rugby player begged her for sex in parks before being rejected, for 'good luck' sex before games, and demanded sexy photos in the months before the pair were sprung at Christchurch Airport as Smith was due to fly out for a test match in South Africa.
Messages between Smith and the woman also show that he met her the night before his 50th test for the All Blacks in Dunedin last year, organising a covert rendezvous away from the team hotel so he wouldn't be snapped.
After they meet, Smith says he 'owes' the woman while she says she hopes he doesn't get in trouble with 'skip' - All Blacks captain Kieran Read - for leaving the team hotel at night.
The star halfback is in Sydney with his All Black teammates preparing for the opening test of the Bledisloe Cup series against the Wallabies at ANZ Stadium on Saturday.
it appeared like I was something I wasn't.'Without anyone knowing who I was or what had happened, I was called a whore, a home-wrecker and a dumb b**** online, while at the same time the New Zealand public showed support for [Smith], telling him he is still their hero.'I've been made out to be the one that was pursuing him as if it was a one off incident when it actual fact it was the other way round.'There's stories written about how the Highlanders are all backing [Smith] and they support him….
but when it comes to me I'm like the villain.'I was definitely the scapegoat so that he could get out of it, he threw me under the bus to try and save his own career.'The impact of that fateful bathroom liaison still lingers for the woman, who now claims management from Smith's Super Rugby side the Highlanders don't want her to train at the same gym as some of their players.'The Highlanders management have said to the [gym] staff that they're not happy that I train there because I was the girl that was involved, and that I might target other players.'I have no intention of targeting any other players, it's kind of a slap in the face because as you can see by those messages it was Aaron that targeted me, and he was the one that started this whole thing years ago.'It's unprofessional and so inappropriate to make any comments to anyone at my gym.'Highlanders chief executive Roger Clark told Daily Mail Australia no representative of the club had requested the woman not to use the gym but he couldn't speak for individual players.'It's not true.
Smith also asks the woman for a photo of herself, to which she replies 'but you have a [girlfriend]'.
Smith asks her if they will have 'secret fun', while also asking her to meet him at a park near his house.
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Definitely not.'As far as the players are concerned you'd have to ask them individually...